Hello, Vivienne Joy here and I’m wondering if you are achieving your full potential?
Remember some of those interviews you used to go to when you went to get a job, and they’d ask you what you hope to achieve in the next five to ten years, and you’d sit there going, dunno, because it seemed so far away?! I didn’t know at 20… I didn’t know at 25, maybe I did by 30, but I was running my own business by then. Buy younger, I didn’t know what I was capable of. I didn’t know what was open as an opportunity. For me, I was quite limited, I think the generation now have different opportunities available. But I also didn’t know what I was going to be doing in five years’ time…I had no idea. In fact, back then I probably didn’t even know what I was doing the next month. But actually, right now, whatever age you are, you have a whole world of experience. So be that learned through challenges, overcoming adversity, or achieving things beyond your wildest dreams. And actually, what happens is, that sometimes people achieve something by putting all the effort in, and once they’ve achieved it, they move on. They revel in it if they’re good at letting their reward centre of their brain do the work, but if not, they just move on and may never set themselves another goal.
The “what next” stage
When I started my She Thrives programme, which was about four years ago now, I remember one of the wonderful ladies came and joined and she had a really successful business…very successful in every way – financially, in her impact, what she was doing, how she felt about it. And she said to me, “I don’t really know what’s next for me”. She said, “I realised that I had this big goal of achieving my business as it is, of getting myself to this space, to this place, to this level of earning and achieving and feeling. And actually, I’ve been doing this now and for the last 18 months. That’s it. So what happens next? I feel like I’m all out at sea, I don’t know what’s going to happen next”. So her year with my She Thrives programme was all about working out what she wanted next.
And this happens with a lot of business owners, even at the seven and eight-figure. In fact, I have a friend who is at seven figures and she’s in exactly the same space. That “now what?” space. So you might have achieved the thing that you thought was going to define you and make you feel amazing. But actually, unless you then start to look at the next thing you want to achieve (after giving yourself a good pat on the back and celebrating), what happens is you will stop achieving your full potential, you will just go “oh, I’ve done it, well done”. And depending on who is around you – your social circle, your business circle – you will start to feel like you’re maybe one of the bigger fish in that pond. And I know because I’ve been in this space. And actually, when you then go into a bigger pond, you start to think, “Oh, I’m not a very big fish. I’m a big thing over here in my little community, and I’m fabulous over here, but actually, when I go somewhere else, I’m not really anything, so actually, if I’m going to expand, I need to work out how to get to that next level what to do”.
Limiting your own capability
I do a lot of parent adult child work – a lot of transaction analysis stuff around the different parenting styles you have of yourself, and actually one of the parenting styles is very much the kind of nurturing parent, and if you had a nurturing parent, or you are one, or you nurture yourself, it will say things like, “you’ve achieved that, maybe people have never even done that, well done for getting there, you can have a rest”. Now this is beautiful, temporarily. But if you are parenting yourself like that, you can limit yourself – you put a ceiling on what you’re able to achieve…your own capability.
So if you’re doing this and you realise you’re doing this, you’re actually limiting your own development, your own kind of achieving your potential. And they say that we never as human beings, ever achieve our full potential because we’re not even using a fraction of our brain. But actually, your own potential as you believe it now, or actually, as you can perceive it for the future, is even more important.
You know, I don’t have a business that turns over a million pounds, that’s not my goal. But actually, there is a version of me that exists out there. That is the million-pound version of me. And I’ll sometimes have a little chat with her because she makes different decisions and thinks and feels differently about everything in life than the version of me that is here. And of course, the version of me that was employed, earning £20,000 a year – I remember her fondly. And so there’s different versions of me. And they all have different expectations and different goals and different habits and different self-talk.
Which version are you right now?
Are you a version of the past? With beliefs like, “I can’t possibly earn more than that? I couldn’t possibly consider having an event with 100 people at it. I couldn’t possibly write a book, couldn’t possibly create a podcast”. Couldn’t possibly = limiting yourself.
Are you in the now? Like, “ooo is it scary so I’m just gonna stay here”.
Or are you living in your future self – your future self that really doesn’t know any boundaries at all? Because of course, it’s unwritten.
That’s my question for you today. Which version are you being? And if you’d like to be a different version, as always, you can book a 15 minute laser coaching call where we really get to the heart of what’s going on, what’s keeping you where you are, or actually, if you’re doing really well, how you can make sure and keep that kind of extreme performance if you like. Make sure your brain is really definitely doing everything it can do to put you in peak performance at all times.
Look forward to speaking to you again.